okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
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