i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
