he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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