Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
That accounts for only three of the penises
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
