I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
