love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
