it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
