I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
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