I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
the day after is always just damage control
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize