I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Randomize
