so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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