dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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