My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize