if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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