Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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