loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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