You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
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