what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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