Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
What changed your mind?
Being sober
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Help me help you realize you are a moron
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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