so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
