How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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