i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
