Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
