if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Randomize
