So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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