Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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