He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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