I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Randomize
