take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
