Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
