thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
