yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I am naked and annoyed.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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