Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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