During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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