Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
