yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
