I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
