lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Randomize
