can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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