His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Randomize
