That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Randomize