And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
