he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
