Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Randomize
