I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
