best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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