So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
