Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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