I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
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