the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
