i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
